In the forever struggle of dealing with the fact that my 30+ year old body is simply not the same as my 20 year old body has been a challenge. Recently, at work, we had a health screening, and it was disheartening. Comparing my stats from 5 years ago to now, I’ve gained 26 pounds. My waist went up 3 inches! Although my other numbers are still in the healthy range, they’re nowhere near what they were back then. At the end of the day, I want to be in good health and also equally strong. I’ve finally got some of my problematic eating habits under control, and I’ve been able to go back to the gym consistently. I’ve been pretty happy with my progress, but boy, can selfies be an absolute soul destroyer.

This is the only photo that I found remotely likeable. Props to filters for making my skin look so smooth and perfect!

This is the only photo that I found remotely likeable. Props to filters for making my skin look so smooth and perfect!

I like lingerie body shots, so I try to incorporate them with my reviews. Since I have been battling these mental monsters for most of 2015, updates have been sporadic. I’ve also had some super important stuff on the side to take care of, but hopefully come end of April/May, things will be back to normal (with monsters slayed!). ;) Are people okay with just flat-lays? I always love pictures because they help sooooo much. Because I prefer body shots, I feel like that’s what people want to see.

What brought on these thoughts were pictures I took for this review. I think I look like a troll with no shape. I somehow managed to take a literal thousand or so selfies (I got my friend’s old iPhone 5c, and apparently I held the trigger on the selfie stick too long??), and going through them was like this draining, depressing chore. Despite these bouts of “I hate how I look on film,” I’m actually 80% of the time (at least) happy with my body. As a sweet friend wrote, “Death by selfie!” Seriously, no joke.

Recently, I’ve been on a huge bodysuit kick. I just can’t get enough of them!! As I previously mentioned, I’m all about form and functionality, so poppers/snaps are a must. I guess some people move the bodysuit to the side when they pee, but seriously, do they not poop? You can’t move the bodysuit to the side when you’re doing that… The thought of getting naked to use the toilet isn’t fun for me either, especially if you’re going out and trying not to touch anything in the stall.

Moving right along…

I purchased this gorgeous Lola Haze bodysuit, A Perfect Package, from a stockist.

Lola Haze Perfect Package Teddy (but actually a bodysuit according to Wikipedia definitions :p) (c) Lola Haze.

Lola Haze Perfect Package Teddy (but actually a bodysuit according to Wikipedia definitions :p) (c) Lola Haze.

Here’s the item description:

Please note: Lace pattern may vary slightly from photo. A Perfect Package…of you! This gorgeous teddy will flatter any figure and perfect all your assets. Gold mesh draped front leaves a peek of lace to tantalize, while minimizing your waist and keeping your goodies mysterious.

What an appropriate name for this bodysuit! I’m huge fan of the gold mesh draping, which is like a big hug around your body, and I also love how it provides additional coverage. The lace pattern on my bodysuit is actually a rose-print. The snaps are smooth and and don’t require weird body contortions in order to snap together or snap apart. (I really HATE bodysuits that have the snaps set directly into the fabric because it can cause the fabric to tear if you aren’t un/snapping at the snap.)

Rose Lace Close-up; lace pattern may vary!

Rose Lace Close-up; lace pattern may vary!

When I purchase bodysuits, it gets tricky. For one, I have a long torso with short appendages – think Captain Seamus from Family Guy hah. Most dresses don’t fall at my waistline but rather, at the base of my rib cage. When I’m buying bodysuits, I look for the following:

1. Adjustable straps – this allows for more length in the torso
2. …preferably spaghetti strap-like for more flexibility
3. If the bodysuit is like a fitted top with sleeves or a halter neck, I tend to size up.
*Just to be clear, this isn’t foolproof due to garment proportions.

I purchased this bodysuit in a size medium. Fit is wonderful despite my actual measurements being a few inches larger. The lace and gold mesh are very, very soft and stretchy. This bodysuit is also nicely made. Laura, the owner and designer, designs and creates all of her samples, but the finished product is produced by a factory in NYC.

However, I’m honestly torn about how I look wearing this. Worn alone, I think this bodysuit makes me look super stumpy, and I don’t think this bodysuit “flatters” me. I think part of the problem is how high the leg cuts are on my person, and I loathe that 90s high-cut look. It’s literally the one trend that I hope stays dead. High cuts don’t make my legs look longer; they make my body look incredibly distorted and emphasize any skin or fat I have around my hips.

Avec Monsieur Cat Butt. :3 Leg cuts are high on my body. PS - where did my waist go??

Avec Monsieur Cat Butt. :3 Leg cuts are high on my body. PS – where did my waist go??

That said, none of that is a huge deal breaker because realistically, I’d pair this with a bottom and go along my merry way. :) Truth be told, I’m not ogling myself when I’m wearing lingerie, but the narrative is different when you’re putting your body out there on the internet and are deleting hundreds of pictures from a selfie stick misadventure.

Lola Haze has been around since 2008, and they’ve received all sorts of press coverage from big shots like Vogue, WWD, and Elle. I haven’t seen much about the brand in blogs, which I think is a shame! The price point is comfortable and fair, and your purchase directly supports a designer with ethical production in the US. The bodysuit I purchased retails for $69, which is on par with numerous higher-end brands and is attainable for those with some disposable income.

I received confirmation from Laura that the website is up and running and attended, so if you’re someone who gets a bit anxious about no dated updates (I can’t be the only one, right??) and quiet social media accounts (which are usually not a good sign in the lingerie world), rest assured! Laura responded to my questions promptly and within a few hours, and I have no doubt that your order will be handled with the utmost attention and care!

Last but not least, here’s another wishlist item – I really should get that second part written – that has totally stolen my heart. It would’ve been perfect for Marc Jacob’s rollerina disco-chic NYFW 2015 party… :)

Lola Haze Golden Goddess  Teddy. (c) Lola Haze

Lola Haze Golden Goddess Teddy. (c) Lola Haze

All items in this post were purchased by me. Lola Haze did not ask for this review, nor was I compensated for it. No affiliate links were used.


Do you have a lingerie wishlist? Like, a real wishlist instead of a shopping list? For me, I’ve never really had one until last year when I literally started writing down what I wanted in a paper journal. I’ve gotten a lot better with the impulsive/sale lingerie and have reached the point where I’m willing to pay full price for something that I like or want. (It has taken me about 8 years to finally reach that point – no joke.) A lot of it has to do with not wanting to hoard lingerie and/or be surrounded by things I’m not really fond of or of things I don’t wear. I’d rather have the money instead and put it towards visiting all my lingerie honeys. ❤︎

Anyway, back to the wishlist. I like having a wishlist! It really makes me think long and hard about whether or not this is something I love vs. a passing fancy. (A good test is, “would I pay full price for it?”) I tend to have super obsessive tendencies that are temporary, but thus far, everything on this list has captured my heart. I would eventually love to buy everything on my list (and the intention of this list is to hopefully make that happen), so here’s to sticking to the path. ;)

Alexandrea Anissa

Alexandrea Anissa Kitten Bralette, (c) Hana Haley.

Alexandrea Anissa Kitten Bralette, (c) Hana Haley.

My dear friend Charging Sky is a huge fan of Alexandrea Anissa, and that’s how I was introduced to Vanessa’s brand! (Seriously, if there was a patron of AA, it’d be her.) She looked amazing in all of her pieces, but my absolute favorite on her was the Kitten bralette, which she has worn also as outerwear. This puppy has been on wishlist forever, and remember those obsessive tendencies? Yeah, I wouldn’t shut up about it. My cries were heeded by my other dear friend Technicolor Lover, who gave me a gift card to AA to make my kitten dreams come true. My bralette was sent to work, and I’ll be receiving her on Monday. This is literally the *only* situation where I wish Monday would come sooner. Wishlist: CHECK!

Dottie’s Delights

Dottie's Delights Bow Playsuit, (c) Kimberly Capriotti.

Dottie’s Delights Bow Playsuit, (c) Kimberly Capriotti.

Ever since I saw the perpetually adorable Thigh Highs and Glitter review the Dottie’s Delights Mosh Bow Bodysuit I wanted it. Soooooo bad. I love how the mesh is stretchy, so I really could wear this while eating tacos and not resort to cutting myself out of it after. I really love how the bow applique provides coverage for the nips, but I’m even more in love with the coverage for the bottoms. Seriously, not everyone takes it all off, and I hate it when styles seems targeted towards women who shave/wax all of their pubes.

Caveat: I don’t think this comes with crotch snaps, which are almost a requirement for every bodysuit I purchase, but I’ll plead/beg/pay an upcharge before purchasing to see if this can happen because a girl’s gotta pee without getting naked in a dirty-ass bathroom stall with no TP, without toppling over in heels. (Sorry, this entire “move it to one side” isn’t going to cut it anymore, especially when you’re fumbling in your purse for napkins.)

Hopeless Lingerie

Hopeless Dana Top & Knickers, (c) Hopeless Lingerie.

Hopeless Dana Top & Knickers, (c) Hopeless Lingerie.

Although a lot of lingerie silhouettes are far from original, Hopeless has some of the cleverest and distinct lingerie “cut outs” that I have ever seen. Gaby’s recent collection Ghosts has me so very, very excited. My eyeballs almost fell out of their eye sockets! I hadn’t been this excited since Phases, specifically about the Valentina bodysuit and neoprene pieces. (I wish this collection would be remade; I didn’t have the funds or time to acquire anything from Phases because I bought my damned house, waaaaah.)

The Dana top and Dana knickers is so well-designed; I love how it has the feel of the bodysuit and looks just as good from the back as it does from the front.

I actually don’t know if this set would look good on my body type because my broad shoulders may be further emphasized by the cutouts, but I don’t care. The Dana top is just so perfect in every single way, and paired with the matching knickers, I’m in love!

Part 2 to come, but tell me, if you’d like to share, what’s on your wishlist? Word of mouth can be a dangerous thing, but suffice it to say, thanks to the internet and social media, I’ve seen so many wonderful things that I wouldn’t have seen otherwise!

Happy August! Lingerie reviews are hard for me to churn out in the summer because it’s so damned hot. Think 110 degree days with heat index. Also: too many bugs. Most of the time, I just lounge around in a pair of cotton brief undies. Hoping some rain (and autumn!) will come soon.

I usually write long ass reviews, but given how I’m melting, have no energy, and a raging headache, I’m going to make this pretty quick:

1. Amoralle is the stuff that dreams are made of.

2. The garments are handmade & handsewn in Latvia. Fabrics are usually almost always produced there, too. Paired with lower manufacturing expenses + cost of labor, prices for their gorgeous pieces are priced well. That doesn’t mean the prices are inexpensive, especially for a luxury brand.

3. The designs are decadent and indulgent. Billowing sleeves, endless yards of fabric, rows of velvet covered buttons, crystal finishes… Look no further.

I purchased the Breezy Hyacinth bodysuit during their last flash sale. I’ve wanted this piece for many months, and when I saw it was available during the sale, it was a no brainer. (I also picked up a pair of leggings.) My order shipped very quickly, too – in only a couple of days, yay! But it took about two weeks for it to arrive in the US.

Amoralle Breezy Hyacinth Body, (c) Amoralle.

Amoralle Breezy Hyacinth Body, (c) Amoralle.

Ladies + gents, there aren’t enough words to describe how beautiful this garment is; this bodysuit did not disappoint. I’ve bought a lot of lingerie over the course of my lifetime, but this piece has made me excited about lingerie again.

Everything is perfect: from the buttons, to the fabric, to the velvet trims… PERFECT. My one “complaint” is that fabric content is not listed on a tag in the garment. The top half of the body feels like a heavyweight silk charmeuse (with lycra or elastane). If it’s indeed synthetic, it’s damned good convincing. The bottom half of the body is comprised of a super soft and silky jersey + lace panel. The suspender straps have a large, ~1″ pyramid jet black crystal sewn to the center of each bow.

Close-up view of the body. (c) Amoralle.

Close-up view of the body. (c) Amoralle.

Sizing is limited, but based on comments I’ve read, most of Amoralle’s customers fit into their S/M/L. Hopefully they’ll consider expanding their size range in the future. Since I have broad shoulders, I usually size up in garments with set sleeves. In this case, I purchased a L, and it fits my long torso and shoulders perfectly. The bodysuit also has eye and hook closures at the crotch – hooooray! And just as a point of reference, I typically take an 8/10 in US dress size.

I wish I could’ve purchased the stockings that matched this body, but alas, it’s been out of stock for awhile. :(

tl;dr (seriously, this is one of the shortest posts I’ve ever written): Amoralle is life, and I am in love with lingerie all over again.

Amoralle Breezy Hyacinth worn with Leg Avenue back seam stockings. (I literally rolled out of bed and smeared on some lipstick to take pictures for some lovelies on IG who wanted to see a full body shot of the body.)

Amoralle Breezy Hyacinth worn with Leg Avenue back seam stockings. (I literally rolled out of bed and smeared on some lipstick to take pictures for some lovelies on IG who wanted to see a full body shot of the body. :P)

All items in this post were purchased by me. Amoralle did not ask for a review. No affiliate links were used.

I really didn’t mean for so much time to pass between updates! However, I have been dealing with huge computer problems that most likely culminated into losing my hard drive despite all my backups (thanks, FileVault). I had some hardware replaced, but dealing with Mavericks and seeing that iPhoto is no longer part of the OS, it’s been fun: a lot of fun.

Recently, I’ve been very interested in more affordable lingerie options, especially in light of computer repairs and 2 inconclusive vet visits. And honestly, I don’t always want to spend $50 on panties or a bra when I buy lingerie; sometimes I want inexpensive, fun pieces! :)

I’ve always had a special place in my heart for Leg Avenue. Their hosiery and awesomely trashy lingerie got me hooked on undergarments that weren’t white, beige, or black. Lately, Leg Avenue has been putting out some pretty stuff with their Vixen Collection. I really liked a lot of what I saw and found myself browsing through their other items.

After flipping through various online catalogues, this lovely bodysuit caught my eye:
Leg Avenue Bodysuit (86502) - Stock
Image from Rakuten

This is officially called, “Mesh Halter Underwire Teddy with Vintage Girdle Stitching.” It’s style number is 86502. I purchased mine for ~$18 including shipping.

There is visible contrast stitching on the black strap detailing which doesn’t appear in the stock photos or in most photographs taken from afar):
Leg Avenue Bodysuit (86502) - Detail

This bodysuit is sized S, M, L and has lightly padded underwire cups. I purchased the M, and fit-wise, it’s kind of meh. I manage to convince myself every time that underwire cups with general sizing will work on me, but it rarely ever works out. The bodysuit is made of a stretchy soft mesh, which is almost too large on me. However, the cups are too small, the gore doesn’t tack, and the band is too big and stretchy. I probably would size down, but there’s no way that I could get my entire bust into an S. To me, that’s saying something since I *usually* wear a 34B or a 36A…

I bent the wires a bit, so that it would encompass my breast tissue a bit better despite scoop scoop scooping. Since I don’t expect to get any support from this, I am somewhat tempted to cut out the underwires…

I think this bodysuit would be a lot better if there wasn’t an underwire in the bust, especially since it’s sized S, M, and L; it would definitely encompass a lot more sizes, but the bra-top makes it borderline size restrictive. Given that the vixen lingerie collection is sized similarly, I am extremely hesitant to invest into the pieces that have a built-in padded underwire. (The bralettes are also a bit questionable, too, even without the wire. I’ll address this in another review, but the cups end up being too large despite the firm band.)

I do like this bodysuit, but I may make some modifications to it. We’ll see!

Here’s how it looks on me, even with a few pounds I’m carrying thanks to all the poor eating decisions I’ve been making:
Leg Avenue Bodysuit (86502) - Front Pic

I like it styled with the fake leather jacket I studded by hand, though. :D Seems super punk rock, especially when you aren’t wearing pants. :D

Leg Avenue Bodysuit (86502) - Styled
Bodysuit is Leg Avenue, garter is from Beautifully Bound, jacket is some random brand purchased from Marshalls hand-studded by me, and shoes are Melissa.

All items in this post were purchased by me except for the shoes, which were a present from my NY gal, Sue! :D

I swear I have other brands that I love and adore, but since Liya (La Lilouche) only has a few more days left on her Summer Sale, 30% off everything in her shop, I wanted to post one of the newer pieces I purchased a couple months ago.

In my previous life, I swear I must’ve been a magpie. If it’s shiny and covered in sparkles (glitters/sequins – I don’t discriminate!), chances of my wanting it are increased by 75%. I’m also a huge fan of bodysuits; there’s just something so sexy about them. Thank god for Mila, an homage to badass women of the 70s.

I just love everything about this piece. Harness and bodysuit in one? I’m all over it.
Lalilouche Mila Harness

Black and gold sequined panel.
Lalilouche Mila Harness (inset)

Gold-toned hardware + smooth, high-quality elastic.
Lalilouche Mila Harness (hardware)

Okay, so when it comes to bodysuits, I need a way out. Literally. Bodysuits that do not allow me to easily relieve myself are not going to fly, nor am I going to get naked and crawl out of a bodysuit while in the toilet. For me, bodysuits must come with crotch snaps! (Let’s call them what they are.)

After sending Liya a note, I asked if I could get my bodysuit made with snaps, and she happily obliged for no additional charge. I really love the small requests that you can make with handmade companies, especially since everything is made to order; it allows room for reasonable customization without absurd up charges. I was concerned that the snap area would be bumpy, but Liya ensured enough snaps were sewn, so that the bodysuit would lie flat at the crotch

By the way, these snaps are also super cool. They don’t snag and snap shut together easily.
Lalilouche Mila Harness (snaps)

I am wearing a Medium. Liya had my lingerie made within a few days, and I received it a few more days later.

I think this piece is flattering on all body types. The leg openings are cut modestly, and the lines of the piece draw’s one attention through the center of the body to the collarbone. I have broad shoulders, and I don’t feel that they’re a point of focus. This bodysuit balances nicely on the body. Love!

Lalilouche Mila Harness (worn - full) Lalilouche Mila Harness (worn - partial)

Bra is DKNY in 32D (more on this later – I actually wear 36A in La Lilouche and what would be most British brands), and thong is Blush in Medium. All items in this post were purchased by me.